My little Angel

Last night I had an unusually vivid and memorable dream. In this dream I adopted a rejected toddler from abusive parents, a little girl with red-blonde hair who didn't want to keep her birth name.

I called her Angel...

She was the sweetest little girl. Feisty, stubborn and a mind of her own, yet caring and kind. In the flashy, montage style of a dream I lived a life with this little girl. I raised her and cared for her.

The dream jumped to many years later, where I was meeting her after a long period of absence in a little cafe. In skated (literally, on rollerblades) beautiful, fully grown Angel. We chatted for a while, laughed over something I have forgotten.

And then I woke up.

I was seriously depressed. It took me a good 20 minutes to come to terms with the fact that Angel didn't exist. I still feel sad about it and it's been a whole day. I felt this horrible sense of loss. I'd lost a child. In one night I had lived a lifetime with this girl. 

This one dream has taught me at least one facet of the joys of fatherhood, the plight of abused kids and orphans, challenges of being a single parent, and that my brain is capable of imagining hair that is both blonde and ginger. It's one of the best dreams I have had in a LONG time, truly a gift from God.

I decided Angel should make at least one mark on the real world, even if only in this quiet little corner of the internet. 

Goodbye, my little girl.